Settling down

Three days ago a bunch of friends from church showed up at my apartment, and in three hours had all my stuff moved to either storage or to my new home, Kathy's house. Since that time I have had to rearrange almost every aspect of my life to accomodate my new surroundings, including another dog and no wi-fi until Kathy can remember or reset the password.

First, I am very thankful to all the people who have helped and continue to help me through this very tumultuous time. On Saturday I wasn't able to thank properly all the people who helped me move. I tried as hard as I could to keep it together, but in the end I found myself hiding in a back room hugging my cat and crying my eyes out while everyone else got the rest of my stuff unloaded and went on their way. Thank you cards are definitely in order.

I hate that I can't keep myself under control for a simple move, or that the kindness of friends still overwhelms me with mixed feelings of gratitude and unworthiness. My good friend has opened up her home to me with no hesitation, sharing her beautiful surroundings as a place for me to recenter and decide what the next step should be. For now, I content myself with "nesting", cooking meals, unpacking and organizing my surroundings and hoping that a feeling of security and safety might find me in this new environment.